Monday, November 28, 2011

Who am I really?

I’m struggling here.

I’ve been trying to figure out what it is that makes me different from every other mom blogger out there. What’s my angle? What’s my niche?

And guess what I’ve realized?

I’m so not unique.

I’m a white, English-speaking woman. I was born in Canada. My parents were born in Canada. My grandparents were born in Canada. I have a white husband. We have a very pale little 21-month old girl. We live in a big suburb. We’ve got a semi-detached, back-split home. We’re due with our second child in about 3 weeks. And then our little family will be complete. Mom, Dad and 2 kids.

It’s undeniable. I’m a total cookie cutter.

I asked my mom what made me different as a parent blogger (since she always offers a very unbiased and objective opinion of me… as moms are known to do). And she said, “Well, you aren’t a lesbian, a visible minority, a full-time working mom or a full-time stay at home mom either. Maybe that’s what makes you unique!”

She loves me and she’s cute… but I’m not sure she quite understood the question.

So I decided to take a good, hard look at my life. How am I different? Would I call myself cultural? “Honey – remember that time we went to Quebec and ordered our Subway sandwiches in French? We’re so ethnic, aren’t we??”

Would I call myself out-of-the-ordinary? Hmmm… I’m a sleep-deprived mom who wears Lululemons and loves Starbucks lattes. A bit of a dink, perhaps. But different? Maybe not.

Then I realized something else.

Despite all this, I have stories worth telling. I tell them with passion. I tell them with humour. I let other parents out there know that sometimes I mess up. Sometimes I get depressed. But – holy crap – this is the most amazing experience in the universe, and we should be talking about it. We should be learning and growing from each other. We should be enjoying it.

In my older blog, I wrote about my pregnancy and all about Anna’s first year of life.

Shortly after having her, I experienced this moment. I remember feeling it so intensely. And needing to make sense of it all. Did my words help any other new moms? Maybe. I know for sure that it was cathartic.

When I started getting out and about with Anna, we experienced this. And I learned about the power of the simple things in life. Of happiness.

And when Anna had just turned one, I experienced this moment. It made me realize how much my life has changed. How much love I felt. How incredible everything was now – just because she was here.

Sure, all Moms love their kids and talk about how great they are. From that perspective, I may not stand out on paper to the folks at But I’ve got a unique, amazing, incredible life. Every moment I’ve had since getting pregnant with my first daughter has taught me this.

Through the laughter and the tears, each experience helped me realize I’m not the only one going through this right now. Each experience has made me realize how incredibly lucky I am. Each experience has made me who I’m meant to be.

A mom.

And that’s a pretty unique, incredible thing.


  1. I think you're all uniquely awesome.

  2. Heather, you are unique and no one is as eloquent as you are! You speak for so many young Moms, wives and daughters when you write~! Who could do it better? I look forward to reading your blogs in the Parent Magazine!!!

    Aunt S{:>)))))

  3. Why do you have to be "different" to stand out? I agree, why can't you bring all of the Moms together to experience this extremely unique experience we've never experienced before. I go to your blog for a great story, lots of advice from other Moms and to know I'm not alone. I think that's pretty unique. Your blog is wonderful and so are you!

  4. P.S. Anna's jeans rock - where are they from?!

  5. Thank you guys!! :) I love you all.

    Chrysta - those are Anna's first-ever pair of skinny jeans (she was a year old in the pic). I think they're from The Children's Place. Or Baby Gap. I'll have to double check when I pull them out again for baby #2. Baby skinny jeans! My secret addiction! Couldn't you just die??